Intimacy vs. Ministry

It seems that the most common issue in Christian ministry is the issue of intimacy and relationship with God. When I was in high school and then Bible college my paradigm of going into ministry was really just based on my own pride and hunger for the spotlight. I wanted to be this big preacher guy who had the fire of God and would do radical alter calls, etc, etc... I didn't think it was based on pride at the time (we never think that), but looking back I realize now that if I had gotten any power on my life my relationship with God would have gone down the tubes a lot faster than I would have realized.

Today I've been thinking about what my life and salvation would have been like if I hadn't been in a prayer room for the past 5 years. What if I had finished out Bible School and then gotten a job as a youth pastor, or as a traveling speaker or something? The reason I left school in the first place was because I realized that my classes weren't teaching me anything about character or integrity or life in God. As a Youth Min. Major most of my classes consisted on how to keep attendance in your youth group, how to grow your attendance, how to plan a summer camp and so on. But none of my classes taught me how to get out of sin so I could lead others out too. None of my classes were on how to pray and fast and study the word. My Bible classes were super interesting and full of information but they didn't teach me how to get the Word living and burning in my spirit to make me alive in God. If I had kept on that course I wonder if I would really be saved...maybe enough to get by but would I have made it through the days ahead? Would I have survived through the fire of God's coming judgments, or would I grow cold and then offended eventually to fall away and be one among the many in the Great Apostasy?

After having virtually no "ministry" (as some would define that term) for the past five years I've come to realize that God really doesn't care all that much about the size or effectiveness of our ministry anyways. My point is that He does care about our ministry and about us touching and reaching other people but if we had a big or small ministry that won't count in eternity. The only thing that will not burn away is God's word. Whatever we do in life that is not out of a humble heart in service to God won't count. That's why even a cup of cold water means so much and will never be forgotten because if it's done as a gift to God it's an act that will be remembered for eternity.

In the sermon on the mount Jesus doesn't say anything like, "Blessed are those who preach to the masses," or "Blessed are the miracle workers," or "Blessed are the anointed worship leaders." He says blessed are those who hunger and thirst for God. Blessed are those who pray and fast and give their money to a place that moth and rust do not destroy. Blessed are those with treasure in heaven. How many ministers of the Gospel are there in America today who have traded their relationship with God for ministry? They think they don't have time for personal devotion and prayer because they have to get the new fresh sermon. But true ministry will flow out of a heart that is alive in God.

I'm not trying to say that we should forget about ministry and just do our thing and love Jesus. But I think there is a better way to do ministry than what the norm is today. I think there's a better and more effective way to really touch people than to hurry up and get behind that pulpit and start preaching. I think that the most effective way to do ministry is to wait until you're 'sent by God.' What if instead of going from High School to Bible School to Seminary to Associate Pastor to Senior Pastor you just waited? What if you just waited in the presence of God and built a prayer life? What if you read the Bible 100 times before you preached even one sermon? What if you waited to get God's vision for your life and ministry before you just went for it? I don't know how much this is making sense or if I'm even making any sense. I feel like so many ministers are so zealous to touch people that they're hurrying up to get out there but they don't really have anything to offer so they're not producing that much fruit, and the fruit they are producing is just dying off anyways.

What I want for my own life is to be in love with God and to have His Word burning in my spirit. I want to have a real relationship with Jesus. Then out of that place I want to be a noble vessel to be used for noble purposes. Of course I still want to see powerful ministry times and anointed preaching with signs and wonders but I want to see hearts touched with longevity. I want to see sound conversions not emotional decisions for Jesus. And at the end of it all I want Jesus to say well done Shawn, you grew in love for Me and for others and you had revelation in your spirit. He won't be interested in the size of my ministry, He'll be interested if I responded in love and humility to every situation; and for the times I did I will be rewarded forever.

Stunning

Our neighbor just had a baby 2 days ago and she's still in the hospital recovering. Her husband is at home with the 4 other kids, and so Anna offered to babysit whenever they needed. She's already been over twice in the past week to help out and lay the smack down.

Tonight is our weekly date night and a big one because I was out of town all last week, but our neighbor called up to see if we would babysit so he could go visit his wife and new baby at the hospital. Anna said yes, and very generously sacraficed our date night. Not only that but because I've been feeling under the weather ever since I got back from California she let me stay home to get some rest.

So I just want to take this opportunity to say how amazing and kind my wife is! Thanks so much Babe. You are stunning!!

Raising Up Intercessors

I've been thinking a lot since the Onething conference last weekend. One of the nights we had a ministry time for those who felt like they were called to be "Anna's" and serve the Lord in His House of Prayer with prayer and fasting. I'd guess that 50 or 100 people stood up to respond. 50 people in Sacramento that said; "Yeah, I want to serve the Lord in the Prayer room and give my life to praying and fasting for revival." That is a bold statement, and a lot of people proclaimed it!

What I've been thinking about is how do we get those 50 people who stood up into the prayer room once the conference is over? About 15 minutes away from the campus that hosted the conference is the Roseville House of Prayer. I went in there a few times after the conference and there wasn't anybody new. There wasn't 50 young people praying or fasting. Obviously that's not a realistic expectation, but how do we get young people from the conference to the prayer room? How do we raise up intercessors other than by laying hands on them during a ministry time?

When Frank Bartleman would travel and preach there would be a breakout of night and day prayer. He carried such an anointing and spirit of prayer on his life that it was contagious. The Onething conferences need the very same anointing. But it's only attained by praying. So I guess we are doing the right things and waiting for the Divine breakthrough.

Spidey Gets the Red Out

From USA Today:

"An exclusive first image from Spider-Man 3, due in theaters in May 2007, indicates a change of garb, as Spidey shifts from his signature red suit to black. Tobey Maguire returns as the arachnid-bitten Peter Parker/Spider-Man. Kirsten Dunst is back as on-off love Mary Jane.

But there's a new woman in Peter's life: Bryce Dallas Howard as Gwen Stacy. Thomas Haden Church (Sideways) is bad-guy Sandman. And director Sam Raimi returns at the helm."

So in case you didn't know: I'm a nerd and like comic books.

Tall Decaf Cappuccino

I swear, if you blidfolded someone and dropped them out of an airplane into any random location in California the chances of them just walking into a Starbucks before any other establishment have got to be shockingly high.

At any given Starbucks you're not more than two minutes away from another Starbucks; so if all Starbucks had a drive-thru you could potentially drink 15 hot cups of coffee in 30 minutes on your way to any given location.

Now there's some java for thought.

Ministry

This evening was the first session for the Onething Conference, out here in Sac-town (Sacramento for all non-native, non-gangsters).

Jackson Senyonga was the speaker tonight. He was off the cuff.  He has a powerful reality of prayer.  After his message he gave a salvation call and several people (10-ish) got saved tonight!  Those small responses never cease to make me love Jesus more.  After that, he had everyone stand and the whole room prayed out-loud to the Lord for several minutes.  After this the room was in a clear state of I-need-more-of-God-ness and so he opened up the front of the room for any who want to come and the open space between the stage and the front row was instantly full with people on their knees making conversation with God!

It's moments like that which make me so proud to be part of the Onething team.  This is a great way to spend my life.

Confession

We landed at Sacramento Airport yesterday after 6 hours on our airplane. One of my favorite things about flying is at the baggage carousel when we collect our 25 huge, blue, rubbermaid tubs and our 7 instrument flight cases holding our guitar pedal boards, monitor equipment, and cables. People are always staring at us like the circus is in town or something. "Are you guys in some sort of band? What is all that stuff?" And it's usually old women that ask. It's good to know that that's the crowd we're attracting when we go to do our young adult conferences. Now all we need to attract more attention is matching blue and white jump suites: GO TEAM ONETHING!

After we pile all our gear into the back of a huge box truck (which is a nice relief from the standard 7 suv's) we head off to get
lunch. Of course where else would we go other than IN-N-OUT? This is where my confession comes: I had fish tacos instead of a double-double. I totally let Steven down. Half the gang (the healthy half) went to a nice fast-food mexican place similar to Baja Fresh. The rest of us went next door to the IN-N-OUT, except after all the travel my appetite was not going to give way for a burger, no matter how fresh or tasty. So I walked over to the mexican place and received quite a bit of slack from my teammates when I stood in line to order the "Famous Fish Tacos." But like I always say, "You gotta
do what you gotta do."

Sac Town

In less than 12 hours I'll be in the air on my way to Sacramento, California for the Onething Conference. It's at a university and we're expecting close to 2,000 people to show up. That's great. It seems that a lot more people come when it's free. Coincidence? I think so.

This will probably be my personal highlight for the Onething Tour this year because my old roomate Ben lives out in Sacramento. Ben and I practically spent all day, every day together for almost four years. We invented our own sense of humor. Ever since he moved to California a lot of my jokes have gone un-appreciated or even un-told with the knowledge that insetead of laughs I would only get blank stares and cricket noises.

Another reason this will be a highlight trip is that it's our last trip to the west coast which means my last chance for IN-N-OUT in 2006. This is where self-control will need to come in to play so I don't try to eat a 12 month supply of Double-Doubles in only 3 days.

Does anyone know if you can you freeze a hamburger and fries?

Do floutists get blisters?

When my band in Colorado used to play local shows I would always joke around while we were loading in that I should have played the flute. Then I wouldn't have to carry a heavy bass drum, toms, hardware, cymbals and then unpack it all (of course once it was all onto the stage I loved setting up my kit from scratch. That feeling of, if I set it up better than last time I'll play brilliantly) only to do tear it all down again after the show and then figure out how to get it all back into my car because traveling with a five piece drum set in a Honda Civic is like eating a sandwich at Arthur Bryants: 4 pounds of beef crammed between two slices of Wonder Bread.

Today when I was playing at IHOP for the 10AM it hit me how funny it is to be a drummer. For 14 years I have been spending lots of money to buy quality equipment and to play with well made sticks instead of the bargain banana brand. But it doesn't end there; it's not like the flute: you don't buy your gear and now your set. Nope; with my instrument everything I own breaks. But what else is so funny is that I'm the one that breaks it. It's the opposite problem of kids in an antique shop. I buy it then break it. I buy it knowing I'm going to break it.